Ten commandments for wives

Go to long version outline of 10 commandments for husbands

Intro: Definition of the home:

  1. Little boy's: "It's where we eat!"
  2. Teenage girl's: "It's where we go between midnight & daybreak when all else is closed."
  3. Husband: "It is where we go to fight our private battles."
  4. Wife: "It is where we slave the hardest and are appreciated the least."
  5. "Home is where the great is small and the small is great."
  6. "Home is where our stomachs get three meals a day and our hearts a thousand."
  7. "Home is a place where a world of strife is shut out and a world of love shut in."
  8. "Home is where we complain the most, but have the greatest blessings."

Commandment #1:

Expect not thy husband to give thee as many luxuries as thy father hath given thee after many years of hard labor. (Phil 4:11; Amos 4:1)

Commandment #2:

Thou shalt work hard to build thy house with the husband that you have, not fantasizing about "the one that could have been". (Prov 14:1)

  1. Fond Footsteps. I was visiting friends who had just celebrated their 54th wedding anniversary" The husband entered in his work boots, heaving clods of dirt behind him on the spotless kitchen floor. Expecting the wife to be upset, I said, "His boots certainly do bring the dirt in." "Yes," she said with a smile as she got up to get the broom. "But they bring him in too." by Shirley Scott

Commandment #3:

Thou shalt not nag...hit him with thine frying pan, it is kindlier. (Prov 27:15; 21:19)

If the husband says…

Wife replies…

Sarah called Abraham Lord and walked 50 feet behind him.

God told Abraham to listen to the voice of his wife and obey all that she says Gen 21:12

Folding laundry is woman's work

Jesus neatly folded his laundry in the tomb John 20:7

Cooking is woman's work

Jesus cooked breakfast by the sea Jn 21:9

Making the bed is woman's work

Peter commanded Aeneas to "arise and make your bed" Acts 9:34

Acts 6 "We can not neglect the word of God to serve tables"

Did you notice that the apostles appointed 7 MEN

If I go to all the trouble of making a mess, the least you can do is clean it up.

If you go to all the trouble of making all the money, the least I can do it spend it!

Cleaning the house is not my work

Jesus cleansed the temple: Jn 2:13-16

Commandment #4:

Thou shalt coddle thy husband and be a warm wife. (1 Cor 7:3-5)

The wife should not defaud the husband of his due. We know what the guys never grow tired of

What due does a man owe his wife?

Commandment #5:

Remember that the frank approval of thy husband is more to thee than the side glances of many strangers. (Ezek 16:32; 2 Pet 2:14)

Commandment #6:

Thou shalt not yell at thy husband but will be a gentle and quiet spirit. (1 Pet 3:1-4)

  1. I have counseled a couple where the wife natters at the husband and he leaves for another room. She follows him into that room and continues nattering. He kept going from room, floor to floor, till finally he hit her. She wasn't hurt or bruised, but he should have just left. But did the wife share in the reason for getting hit?

Commandment #7:

Permit no one to assure thee that thou art having a hard time of it. (1 Pet 5:9)

  1. Husbands: Low self esteem was ranked as the number one problem among women.
  2. Ask your wife after church today if she feels you respect and feel she is important!

Commandment #8:

Thou shall not fail to dress up for thy husband with an eye to please him, as thou didst before marriage. (Sos 4:9-11)

  1. I have a saying, that a women enters middle age when she cuts off her long hair very short.

Commandment #9:

Thou shalt submit to thy husband from thy heart and allow him to be head of the household. (Col 3:18; 1 Pet 3:6; Eph 5:33)

Patterns Of Submission & Headship In The Bible

SubmissionHeadshipBible Texts
All creationGodJas 4:7; Heb 12:9
ChristGod1 Cor 15:28
All CreationChrist1 Cor 15:27-28;Heb 2:2;Eph 1:20-23;Phil 3:21;1 Pe 3:22
ChurchChristEph 5:24
ChurchLeaders1 Cor 16:16; 1 Th 5:12;Heb 13:17 (minister=servant/under rower)
ChildrenParentsEph 6:1-4; Col 3:20-21; Lk 2:41-52; 1 Ti 3:4
Young menOlder men1 Pe 5:5
SlavesMastersEph 6:5-9; Col 3:22-24; Tit 2:9-10; 1 Pe 2:18-20
CitizensGovernmentRom 13:1-6; 1 Pe 2:13-15; Tit 3:1
Every ChristianTo Others Eph 5:21
WivesHusbandsEph 5:22-24; Col 3:18; Tit 2:5; 1 Pe 3:1-7; 1 Cor 11:3


In Gen 18:6 Abraham said to Sarah, "Make ready quickly, three measures of fine meal, knead it and make cakes." Can you imagine Sarah answering, "Do it yourself"? This attitude would have been out of character for her because "Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord." 1 Pe 3:6 A wife's big test of faith is if she will submit to her husband when he is unreasonable and selfish, or when she knows she is being wrongs by his attitude. Jesus never asks us to do anything He has not already done Himself! Bible subjection never implies inferiority but rather strength!

Commandment #10:

Thou shalt assure thy husband and others that he is the greatest man alive. (Phil 2:3; Sos 5:9-16)

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